Within you

God made earth before humans. Everything we could want or need has been provided.

The earth, the moon, the sun, the grass, streams, animals. Genesis chapter 1:1-26 shows us just that. God’s manifestation of this world before placing us here. And when we were brought here, he used the rib from one (Adam), to make another (Eve). This shows that maybe, just maybe, we aren’t alone in this big world, maybe we do need one another to survive. Yeah, we all have our own journey, but along the way we meet people who in their own form, help us get to where we are meant to be. Even if it is only in retrospect that we see the purpose and intention of the person’s presence in our lives. He even made us in his image, so we have pieces of him within every part of us.

I’m convinced that we’re given everything we need. It’s within our perspective and application, whether or not we feel prepared. I think about all the old sayings that I’ve ever heard or been told. And how they’ve transformed into guidance of how to live, how to think, how to be. I think they further support my argument that everything we could ever want or need has already been provided. It’s within the application of our knowledge… what we do with what we have—if we even use it at all. Sometimes it’s not even poor application, it’s forgetting what you have because you’re always searching for something outside of yourself… as if you’re not enough. As if, God didn’t prepare you.

Say When

Think the cheese grater at Olive Garden, or when you ask your friend to fill up your wine glass. You are told to say “when,” when you want them to stop. When you have received the amount, you’ve wanted.

Let’s apply this.

Do you ever say “when” to yourself? Whether it is maybe you taking on too many projects, or you’re maybe overwhelmed by people in your life. Think about if you hold of saying when while your friends fills up your glass of wine… it’ll overflow. You overflow and suddenly you’re drowning in work, or being suffocated by people who are draining your energy.

Before we learn when to say when, we have to create standards, expectations, requirements. We have to draw a line for how much we are willing to handle; and set limitations and boundaries. This way we don’t lose ourselves in the process of doing for others. This is why we say when. The boundaries and standards you set for yourself not only help you in the long run, but they set a guideline, showing others how to treat you—what you will and will not allow.

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

Tale as old as time, the turtle vs. the hare. I never saw this story the way that I do now… consistency and compounding. The greatest changes or accomplishments aren’t put into fruition from a quantum leap, but consistent steps in the right direction. It’s also the perseverance of the tortoise… it’s tunnel vision couldn’t care any less about what his opposition was doing. 

I’m convinced that we’re given everything we need. It’s within our perspective and application, whether or not we feel prepared.

Never Let the Fear of Striking out Keep you from Playing the Game

I realized there’s a fear of failing, but also a fear of succeeding, and the responsibility that comes with achievement. It’s one thing to hold yourself accountable, but another for people to hold you to a higher standard; and once you show what you’re capable of, there’s no going back.

I’m trying to transform the narrative… removing the negative connotation of fear, succeeding, of being held at a high standard, being held accountable. Especially as a person who wants more. Who feels unsettled. I think the most unsettling thing is that I’m living a lifestyle the polar opposite of what I’ve ever imagined—how did I get here? Not claiming what I want. Not developing a plan. Spontaneity always sounded like a sexy word until I saw myself living an unfulfilling life. 

In order to eliminate the fear, you must eliminate the root of the fear.

More Than a Game

The importance of signing up kids for sports is a hill I will die on. My greatest life lessons stemmed from what I picked up over my 20 athletic career. I don’t know if I’ve shared this yet, but I love when things come in full circles; this time being me relaying thee same messages to my athletes as I was once told by my coaches. Full circles.

“Slow down to speed up”

When I think about the concept of slowing down to speed up, I visualize a trap dribble, changing speeds, and levels. Taking a few steps back to see what you have, then attack.

I’m in my season of taking those steps back, establishing core values and deciding what I want and why. I don’t think I have to have everything figured out but, for my next level to look different, I’ll need a system to hold me accountable… I don’t think SMART Goals will do the trick anymore… and now there’s this truth that’s come out about how motivation not being enough, how it’s all about discipline. I didn’t know not being motivated was so normal, how it wasn’t the key to success. Why didn’t I get the memo?

“You practice how you play”

No matter who is watching, you always do things at game speed. It’s how you build good discipline and muscle memory. I’ve actually developed more freedom within age. No teachers telling me homework is due, no coaches telling me to get on the line. So now it’s up to me, to develop and maintain a work ethic. I also see this as, stay ready so you never have to get ready. I remind myself about all the things I want in life, the things I’ve prayed for… how easy it is to get out of practice, if you aren’t working on the part of the iceberg people can’t see. It’s so easy to miss your mark, to miss your blessings simply because you weren’t prepared.

“You have to want it yourself.”

Cue, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make him drink.” Here, I think about the importance of going the extra mile for a less crowded space. Wanting more for yourself and going out to get it because you owe it to yourself. In 2022, so many resources are at our fingertips, it’s about taking advantage of the abundance in front of you.

“Leave everything you have on the court.”

“One of the most serious regrets in life is halfheartedness, in the pursuit of something you value. Half Heartedness is at the root of much failure in life– business, financial, personal and professional”  As a player I was always told to leave it all on the court. Everything I have. Did I step off the court knowing I gave it my all? If not, what could I have done? What do I still have left that could’ve been released? As a coach, I request the same thing out of my players. I don’t care what the scoreboard says, did you give it your all or did you hit the breaks where/when you should have accelerated? Sometimes we slow down to speed up, I understand that, but what caused you to get comfortable jogging on the court? Was it an emotion? Was it something physical blockading you? I love basketball because it just keeps going. You don’t have time to stop and think. Not until the coach pulls you out. You have to train so your reactions are automatic.I don’t care the ball was stolen from you or your shot was blocked. As a coach, as a partner, I’m looking to see how you react to your mistake. It’s not too late to make up for it. There is no time for pity parties. When shit hits the fan, how do you react? No matter the self-doubt, the adversities, you have to give it all… your all. Or someone on the bench will. 

Your ego is also within you,

 in order to grow… you have to let her go. That’s the only way you’ll meet your higher… future self. 

Benefits of letting your ego:

1. Empathy
2. Collaboration… creativity 
3. Communication
4. Trust 
5. Encourages growth

“Egos are attached to thinking they need something external to make them feel good. Searching sometimes frantically for that sense of satisfaction outside themselves.”

See, all these things are inside you, waiting to be set free from the chains of your ego. The moment you get out of your own way is the same moment you let others in. You don’t always have the correct answer or know the right thing to do or say, the most important part about that is that God will send you people who do, that’s why relationships are so important, this is why you find yourself attracted to opposites… think of them as complementary. I believe that in relationships, people bring different qualities, strengths, and characteristics, ultimately creating a harmonious balance. Accepting and embracing these differences only call for further completion of one’s self and said relationship.